Saturday, December 30, 2006
Saturday, December 16, 2006
As a sane but red blooded male I have always thought feminism referred to the struggle for women's RIGHT's or EQUALITY. And as any SANE human being would think, I do not think boiling blood and anger would help at all. My friend Diwakar, who is an ardent feminist pointed out this blog to me and I was shocked to see these extreme views. Equality is the inalienable right of EVERY HUMAN BEING. And equality does not mean boiling men. The author of the blog who thinks that a girl can only be a girlfriend or an enemy is DELUDED. In fact these militant madame's give womankind a bad name. If chauvinism of the male kind is to be abhorred, so is female chauvinism. What has started as a struggle for the right to vote has deteriorated into militant bullshit. The author of the blogsite forgets that without her FATHER'S semen she would not be here to lambast men today.
Unfortunately in struggles for equality, the opressed ften think, that they have the right to play victim and demand "rights" that violate the very spirit of equality. To suggest that 33.33% reservation in parliament for women in parliament would solve all problems is ludicruous and anti-constitutional. Unfortunate most feminists only want such sops to appease their offended feelings. The banner of feminism is being often taken up by women just to cause a furore as they know these female gladiators would be behind them, if only they are able to suggest a sense of wrongdoing. In a book called corporate draupadi, the authoress claims she was sexually harassed by her company (HMT, I think), as she was dismissed unfairly. Of course she forgets the fact that she was dismissed for playing about with the cash. She is also unsurprisingly silent on the sex card when she reveals that she was hired in spite of not having the qualifications for the job!! In another book, women in prisons, the authoress suggests that these bandits who have been punished by the law are heroines. When a man chops up his wife for infedility he should be hung, but when a women kills a drunken lout of her husband, she deserves a presidents meda. The most warped story relates to a girl married to a drunk. She admits that her mother in law is a gem of a lady (A liquor baroness but anyway.........) the hubby assaults the girl's parent's and our pudhumai penn (modern lady), kills her.........get this...........kills her MOTHER IN LAW. WOW!!. Obviously she languishes in jail, while ravaging feminists try to get her out (and wreck havoc with the chopper again, I guess.)
Even worse is the media in promoting the causes of these female saviours. Movies like Sweth (White Rainbow) depicts India in such a way that one would think every widow in India is being tortured, tormented and sexually harassed by the men in the country. Blarney. Such irresponsible depictions only promote these unworthy causes. Yes, widows are being opressed but rather than make such shock-value movies that the psuedo intellectual would weep over, and go home happy that he saw a "meaningful movie", surely a better thing to do would be to silently help such causes wherever they are found. It is disgusting to see such movies depicting scenes like this as if they are reality. And even when real, to depict them as if they are the norm and not the exception.
But back to the topic of female chauvinism, isn't it ridiculous that chauvinism be fought with more intolerance and chauvinism. And it is not as if these females can say they are the voice of womankind. In an orkut community on feminism, when the authoress of the above blog spewed her venom, it was interesting to say that quite a few women felt her ideas were out of line. When one lady went so far as to say she thought her father was a decent man, our fire breathing athoress quickly rebuked her for these "Anti woman sentiments". A number of women do want to simply settle down and marry a man. There is nothing wrong with this. They have the RIGHT to do so. Such perverted feminists have no business coming down on these people, and saying they are traitors. In fact that is a line ecen a chauvinist would not take.
And of course where would an article on feminism be without the sex part? If these gladiators think that every man is lusting behind her, she is sadly mistaken. On the other hand to say that casual flirting is eve teasing and ask that the man be boiled is dumb, and quite frankly nothing to do with feminism (More to do with homosexual tendencies). From time immmemorial, men and women have been mating. Men do try to "make out" with women and vice versa. In fact the pattern of males and females getting together is, I believe, the norm for every species in the world that is not a hermophrodite. For those who think that it is wrong for a man to try to impress a girl or vice versa I strongly suggest a few sessions with a shrink, followed by some serious introspection as to your sexual preferences.
In short, feminism is NOT Female Chauvinism. Equality for one is NOT the supression of rights for another. And boiling the male or female species does no one no good.
Wednesday, September 13, 2006
Tuesday, September 12, 2006
Tree house in which we stayed:
This is the gang that went to Waynad :) From L to R - Vivek, Ananth, Myself, Vijayagopan and Shankar
Friday, September 01, 2006
I have been getting quite a bit of feedback since I posted the the Blog on the Nuremberg Trials. This brings me to a conversation I had with my aunt today where I said Hitler and Gandhi were both alike - Both had a huge ego (stopping short of using the word megalomaniac), both were mass leaders, dictators, intolerant of others ideas, mass murderers (YES, MOHANDAS TOO), eccentric etc. But the biggest similarity in my opinion is that they never stopped thinking they were right. My aunt begged to differ suggesting that Hitler was evil unlike Gandhi, which brings me to the crux of this issue - what is Evil?
Now, most of us do have a value system and when some act shocks us to the core - rape, child murder, cold blooded mureder - for eg. when a person is hacked to death, vampirism (Idi Amin), Genocide etc. we usually agree that the act is evil. Therefore evil is a function of a value system and generally accepted social norms. For eg., in a society if female infanticide was accepted (as is in some villages), in that social setup, it would not be evil. But again, we are dealing on society level here.
Moving to induviduals, now, for me if a child was hacked to death, I would call the murderer evil, and say he ought to be condemned to death. But let us shift sides for a moment. From the murderers point of view, let us say, he ACTUALLY heard the voice of God asking him to exterminate the child (reasons unknown. Note that most people (I refuse to use the word psychopath) who hear God / Unknown voices asking them to exterminate a person is because the voices say that person is evil. A no. of prostitutes have been murdered over the years by zealots for this purpose.), then WE would brand him a psychopath and order him to be committed. But from his point of view is he wrong or evil? HELL NO. He is merely following instructions from God. If he is executed - well it is because WE are evil that he would need to be martyred. How can we even justify the word evil, when we are operating on two different planes? How can we call him a psychopath when for all you know, according to him, we are mad. (Who knows!!)
Therefore, coming to Hitler and Gandhi - I do believe that both were absolutely passionate about their cause. Hitler saw himself as the messiah for Germany, who was merely eradicating pests, the way we might kill some wasps. Can we judge him using our rationale? In my opinion neither are evil, as both sincerely believed in the cause. On the other hand, Himmler, Goering, Goebbels etc. were cold blooded and evil murderers who had no belief in their cause but saw it as a way to gain riches / power / both. These men were evil. Going by the same logic, was Godse evil - No.
Generalising, No man who acts according to his conscience is evil, NO MATTER WHAT HIS CONSCIENCE says. Period.
Sunday, August 27, 2006
Sunday, August 20, 2006
Britain - Colonization of India, USA, South Africa. Racist aparthied policy in SA. Jallianwallah Bagh - India, and the subsequent pensioning off of Dyer. Their policies in India that would have violated any human right's charter. (Just to name a few.)
USA - The segregation policy. KKK - aided and abetted by southern states. Korea. Vietnam.Bay of pigs. Iraq.
Israel (HAVE to include this to show the forked tongue of the jews.) - Terrorism in Palestine.
USSR - 20 millian russians and jews exterminated by Stalin. Polish annexation.
Now, which of these countries had the right to take the moral high?
Wednesday, August 16, 2006
From Simon to Sonia we have two words for you -GO HOME.
Monday, August 14, 2006
But, the blog is totally a response to his!! (so I guess this is justified)
What/who is God? Is it a He/She? Does He/She have a form? Does He/ She belong to a religion?... And many more such unanswered questions!
Accepted, we are the children of a scientific upbringing - we are taught to question everything - never to accept anything at its face value. And I must say, for the lack of ability to ask pertinent questions in other abstruse areas, we keep jumping back to the one area where everything is foggy - even to the greatest of the greatest minds!
To me, God signifies Hope and nothing else. Just think, how many times have we faced situations where we've felt the greatest urge to be reassured - let me describe typical scenarios:
* Your semester results are out and you are glued to your screen, the page is downloading - tell me if you call out to some force then?
* If the above doesnt appeal much to you - imagine the case of a loved one being missing for quite some time - your parents have gone out shopping; they said they'll be back in an hour and its already three hours and no sign of them - do you wish for something then? - dont you say 'let them be back asap and I'll give them a major dressing down'
The hope that you nurture is God. The shoulder to cry on, the solace that you are provided with in times of need is God. The reassurance that you are seeking is God. You might argue that a friend could provide you with all of these and more. But, when you are really down and your friend is trying to cheer you up, dont you feel 'What can he/she do except say all these soothing words? If only it had happened this way' or 'I'd give anything to make this happen'?...If you do, this lamentation of yours is addressed to God.
It is just that often we feel more at ease when we think that 'things cannot be this bad; there will be better times ahead because there is a supernatural force watching over me' and we name this 'guiding/protecting' force 'GOD'.
Is there any religion associated with God? I dont think there is. It is a make-believe world that we create, in order to give our aspirations more credibility. How is it that when JRR Tolkein builds a whole plot as intricate as The Lord of The Rings, with so many fictitious characters, we are ready to buy it, but when the same kind of stories are spun around 'Balakrishna, Kamsa, Rama, Jesus' we question their veracity? Neither is true. The only difference between the two is that the first one is proclaimed to be fictitious while the second one is not - Why? Cos people need to feel secure - It is the inherent need for comfort that makes us cling to our Father - God.
Now, dont say that I am an atheist - I am NOT. I understand that I derive my comforts from the existence of this omnipresent force - I WANT to believe that such a protective armour exists around all of us - I do PRAY every morning and I DO thank Him everyday. I thank the force for not making me one of the many who dont have loving parents and friends, for not making me one of the many who dont get a full square meal everyday, for not making me one of the many who are deprived of education and most of all for loading me with sooooo many good wishes and keeping me safe, secure and comforted. Infact, many of us do this - Does this mean we fear God?
Is there any need to fear God? Is it bad if you are NOT God-fearing?
Lets just take a look at when we DO fear Him - Most of the times it happens when we do things that go against our value system. Have you ever thought how it is that a thing that appears so wrong to you (and merits punishment) is being done with such a free conscience by someone else? It is because the other person has a different set of values. And every time you go against your values you fear that you might be penalised for this - how exactly you do not know - but think again, the fear that you have is NOT that you will be meted out some corporal punishment, your fear is that the next Hope that you have will be crushed. Both are your own creation - the Value System and the Hope! (Is it a math relationship of positive and negative cancelling to give zero? Could be!)
Coming back to Sandy's qn - 'If there is God, why is He letting all these horrible things happen to everyone?' - God CANNOT stop all these calamities, He can only provide you with the Hope that you will escape unscathed.God is a positive ray of hope and nothing more than a force we wish to believe in - Often we need to rest our worries on something more stoic than your friend/parents' shoulder.
Another qn: Does God have a religion? Given my opinion, you shouldn't have a doubt about my answer to this question. The fight over religion is as absurd as a fight over the superiority of Hermoine vs. Harry!
I have a question - Why is there ANY NEED to prove that God exists? If you feel that none of my arguments make any sense, I just ask one question in return - Why do you want to quantify God? Is it necessary that he should be described by an equation ? Is everything scientific out here? Doesn't science itself use the concept of uncertainty - The 'probability' that you will be able to read this blog is 0.7 (just being +ve, lol!) Who is responsible for the remaining 0.3????
Saturday, August 05, 2006
However there is one first which people do not normally think of, and which in my humble opinion gives you as much a kick if not much more than the rest - your first resignation. It is a wonderful feeling to actually hand in ones papers - a sense of euphoria hits you as you realise you can actually do what you want till your last day - after all, what the hell - they cant fire you, right? And the sense of freedom is heightened by the looks of envy on the suckers....er....colleagues faces.
Anyway to quit beating around the bush, on 14th August 2006, I shall proudly and officially join India's millions of unemployed , at least for 45 days, after which I shall unabashedly call myself a student. Ashok Leyland's gain shall be Lancaster's loss.
At the risk of sounding absolutely soppy, I would like to single out a few people I really need to mention.
My mentor Mr P C Balan without whose well timed kicks in the pants it would have been impossible to even think of a future in finance
The director of the MDC Brig. Bhoon - Looking at him, I was absolutely horrified to think that I could end up like him - this only cemented in my mind the need to do my masters.
My first boss Mr T V Seshan - Everytime I would get in a comfort zone and stop thinking of my future, I would be reminded of what a d*ck this guy is and how I really really needed to get the f out.
The service department - The department with the highest employee turnover rate, and we all know why.
My boss Mr M Balasubramanian - It is really tough to imagine a boss who lets you have as much control of your work as this guy. To working at home to extremely flexible hours, it was this man who helped streamline my visa process and it was great working with him since last sep.
Mrs B Radha, Mr Viswanathan and Mr Balaji - Three absolutely great secy's who go out of the way to help you settle in.
Mr SNR - A genuine person who would always be on call to help you in any matter personal or professional.
Mr Srikant Srinivasan - For giving such leeway to a newcomer.
The batch C guys - The best damn batch there ever could be
My friends and colleagues Diwakar, Anandh, Bile, Lindon, Sapta, Koushik, Mushir, Gopi and Neelesh - Guy's who would make the workplace much more interesting than it actually was.
So, having said that let us lay the basic tenets of eccentricity.
1. There is no connection between the XQ (Eccentricity quotient) and the IQ of a human being. (Just look at our Lok Sabha if you want to prove it - 545 men with the IQ of a tree stump and as eccentric as eccentric could be.)
2. Eccentricity does not recognize political / territorial barriers - Fidel castro, G Bush, Modi - all eccentric in their own way.
3. Inventors, Scientists, Authors, Poets, Artists etc. etc do not have an edge over others in eccentricity. All men are born equally eccentric. They only develop to varying degrees. In the case of the above professions a high XQ is a job requirement and only highly developed professionals can succeed.
4. Sex does not determine the level of eccentricity. (Guys, if you doubt me just look at your girl friend / wife / mom or whatever. Gals, you just look at your bf / hubby / dad etc.)
5. Fame merely produces an oppurtunity to display eccentricity and to finetune it. The people around you might be as nutty as a celeb, they just dont get the oppurtunity to shine.
Finally the person who wrote the piece " How eccentric are eccentrics " must be absolutely bonkers for even thinking about such a piece and yours truly even more so for replying to it.
Note : With all POSSIBLE respect to certain carping feminists in the blogosphere - Pl note that the word MEN here should be read as MEN AND WOMEN by YOU wherever necessary. The rest of us normal eccentrics - kindly ignore. This is not meant to be inflamatory / chauvinist / sexist.
Friday, August 04, 2006
It has been my recent fortune to meet one more truly eccentric person. Am not going in to more details about him/her. Suffice to say that the person is AMAZINGLY brilliant and never have I been more impressed by anyone... But rumours are that the person talks to himself/herself etc etc (weird stories runnin around) but the way he/she behaves it is really hard to picture them being anything BUT logical... (first of all a salute to his/her intellectual prowess)
But coming back to what I was writing about, is it true that geniuses are eccentric? Also, if you are eccentric do you belong to the class of geniuses?? Isnt this second qn. the reason why many ppl 'pretend' to be eccentric...?? Who defines eccentricity? What is it to be eccentric????
Can I first have Hari's comments on this before I complete the article???
Friday, July 14, 2006
White rainbow, the film by Dharan Mandrayar, handles this social problem in detail. Dharan describes Vrindavan as the place deprived of happiness and colors.
“ Na koi kushi…
Na koi rang…
Sirf safedh our dukh……….”
The movie moves around four widows, the dynamic Priya, the senile Roop, the disfigured Mala and sexually exploited Deepti. Upon learning of her husband’s sudden death, Priya miscarries her baby; her tragedy compels her to move to Vrindavan where she meets Roop, Mala and Deepti. On seeing the way the widows are treated, she attempts to bring in some change in the lives of these socially deprived women. And, in the process, their transformation takes hold.
Having this as the theme, the movie unveils various hardships faced by the widows and the abysmal life they lead. For instance a visual in which an old woman sitting outside the stinking gents’ loo for just pouring water mars our heart saying that this is the reality. Issues like Sexual exploitation, physical brutality, social inauspiciousness etc were also handled appropriately. Finally the movie ends with the belief that the society will accept these women. In a nutshell, this is the movie to instigate some thought about the deprived widows in the minds of the people.
Facts: (source-Hindustan Times)
- According to the 1991 census there were 33 million widows in India
- In the age group over 60 years, 64% widows have a pension of only Rs 100-500
- There are around 16,000 widows in Vrindavan alone.
Friday, July 07, 2006
Wickepedia says that "Orkut" is named after its creator, Google employee, Orkut Büyükkökten. What should i call him? - an altruist, a social worker or might have been a bench sitter himself. Scraps, communities, fans, hot list, crush list...what not?? In short, orkutting has become a part of life..... the next thing to browse after the mailbox.
Furthermore, playing frivolous games like a kid and vaunting by having higher no of friends..wow what can bring in such a pleasure? When my smart friend received 80% sexy rating and the other one with 100% sexy has ragged him to an extent that the former started bribing people with alcoholic drinks for the sake of the rating. Isn't this interesting?
So let us continue orkutting ......................
Anyway, this begs a much more important question - should Marijuana be banned in the first place? Let us have a look at the effects (immediate and long term, as well as how lethal the drug is)
Source - wikipedia
Varying amounts of paranoia and anxiety in some users
Loss of coordination and distorted sense of time 
Impairment of short-term memory in some users
Auditory or visual hallucinations at high doses in some users
Induced sense of novelty
Increased awareness of sensation
Increased mental activity
Relaxation or stress reduction
Varying degrees of euphoria and feelings of well-being
Initial wakefulness followed by drowsiness and lassitude ("burnt out")
Gain or loss of some inhibitions
Anti-emetic properties (in moderate doses) 
Enhancement of many other drug effects
Lowered intraocular pressure
Increased blood flow and heart rate (tachycardia)
Reddening or drying of eyes
Lower blood pressure while standing. Higher blood pressure while sitting
Increased appetite (often referred to as "the munchies")
Mild, temporary dry mouth
Lethal Dose :It is generally considered to be impossible to achieve a lethal overdose by smoking cannabis.There has only ever been one recorded verdict (although not ultimately upheld) of fatal overdose due to cannabis. In January 2004, Lee Maisey of Pembrokeshire, Wales was found dead. The coroner's report stated "Death due to probable cannabis toxicity". It had been reported that Maisey smoked about six joints a day.
Long term effects :
There is little conclusive scientific evidence about the long-term effects of human cannabis consumption. The findings of many earlier studies purporting to demonstrate the effects of the drug are unreliable and generally regarded as junk science, as the studies were flawed, with strong bias and poor methodology. The most significant confounding factor is the use of other drugs, including alcohol and tobacco, by test subjects in conjunction with cannabis. When subjects using only cannabis were combined in the same sample with subjects using other drugs as well, researchers could not reach a conclusion as to whether their findings were caused by cannabis, other drugs or the interaction between them. In addition, research using cannabis is heavily restricted in many countries, making it difficult to get new studies funded or approved. Since there are so many different compounds in cannabis, it is difficult to predict or accurately measure its effects.
Some conclusions established with some degree of certainty, however, are that cannabis is less likely to cause emphysema or cancer than tobacco.
With this background, it is ridiculous to enforce a blanket ban on Marijuana. The punishment for posession of less than 100 grams is a mere fine. Surely that tells us how frivolous the punishment.is. With insufficient evidence on the dangers of marijuana and effects that are comparable to alcohol / nicotine, it is hgh time this drug is legalized.
But until then, GO PHILLY!!!!
Sunday, June 18, 2006
Firstly I object to Hari’s way of classifying – your people (those who’ve got seats through reservation) and my people. My objective of taking anti reservation (caste based) stand is not only because opportunities are being curbed to ‘Upper’ castes for no fault of theirs, but also to avoid the compartmentalization of the society based on caste.
And I’m afraid Hari is doing exactly that by accusing the SC/ST’s of being Goondas in their colleges…
I strongly feel that Goondaism has got nothing to do with caste or reservation. The way Hari has written has only substantiated their plea for reservation in the society, where they claim that the lower castes are being ‘oppressed’ by the ‘Upper’ castes.
Coming to the core issue, if reservation was started with the sole aim of bridging the gap in the society, I would like to ask what gap they are trying to bridge.
Between the haves & have nots?
Between the rural & urban?
Between the upper castes & lower castes?
Is there any necessity to ensure that people belonging to all castes are represented in their respective proportions in educational institutions? If so what are we trying to build? Educational centres or ‘samathuvapurams’? What about something called merit? Should there not be any importance attached to it? In fact I think we are trying to undermine the ability of the so called lower castes by lowering the cut off marks for them. Instead of equipping them for higher challenges, we are only making them weaker by giving concessions.
While agree with Chandrika’s views that people from very low economic levels have neither the facilities not opportunities to get quality education and training to get into elite institutions, how far reservations based on economic grounds will work out remains to be seen.
I have another question. Education being a much sought after product in the market nowadays and we being customers for it, is the unwritten rule – ‘the haves get the best of products’ applicable here too? Don’t we see the impoverished masses being treated like animals in the Government hospitals, and the aristocratic lot getting the best of facilities in Private hospitals? For that matter, it is the same even in temples & religious institutions, where the poor have to stand for hours to get a glimpse of the deity whereas the rich can perform elaborate poojas in the private chamber of the deity itself. Is there a similar situation springing up in Education too? Is this just an inevitable, bitter pill we’ve got to swallow? Or is reservation (based on economic status) an effective answer to it? If so how can it be implemented? Awaiting your views…
Tuesday, June 13, 2006
Identify yourself. To which category do u belong?
Type 1: Ever Silent
Never never open their mouth in class. Not to teachers, not to fellow classmates. This is the kind of person who is likely to have 1 or 2 select close friends. But then the amount they talk to these friends would be quite unbelievable given their silent nature
Type 2: Never Silent
Always hyperactive, esp with staff. The kind that says 'I can use up a 50 hour internet connection pack in 2 days'... (guys, I think u know who Im talkin abt?) These people try to act like they are really 'it' and they've got 'it' and wat not. Most of the time they are the ones everybody tries to avoid
Type 3: Never Silent (with a slight modification) only with girls
These guys usually abound in Computer Science departments. Even during lunch and tea breaks they dont socialise with other guys. They are always in the company of girls. And if mallus dont take offence, they are usually mallu guys!
Type 4: Sly Characters
These are guys who hang out with 'macho' buddies. But they r actually dying to talk to girls. Will hurt girls in public by making open remarks but usually they are tryin to get the attention of the girls they hurt. Dont have the guts to talk to them openly. This is the kind that is most detested by girls.
Type 5: Variation of Type 4
They have guts to talk to girls, but not in front of their friends. Forever scared of what others might think, what others might say! They will talk to girls only over the phone and if you want a good laugh, you should try to over hear these convos. Some of the silly things they say would be: 'Why dont you come out with me? ' - Knowing full well that the girl will refuse. Sometimes the girl should say ok, then we'd get to see their reaction!!
Type 6: Girl Haters
Try to avoid girls, talk ill of them etc etc. Sorry, cannot give too much importance to such ppl!
Type 7: Thayir saadams
They'll talk to everybody - but only regarding the syllabus, or abt how much they respect some particular staff. But these blokes are much more decent cos they dont involve themselves in any brawls
Type 8: Macho
Forever showing off. Trying to impress ppl by walking on their heads, wearing a shirt inside out, removing the silencer from the motorbike and wat not.... Really entertaining to watch!!
Type 9: Can I call them 'Brahmins?' (again, no religious sentiments/caste sentiments hurting stuff...ok?)
They'll talk to girls, spend a lot of time with them, claim to be friends, BUT will bitch like crazy... worse than girls....really pathetic to watch them at work
Type 10: Charmers
The best of the lot! Good looking guys, will speak very politely with all girls, will not bitch about them, will do anything to keep up their honour. Rare find!
Anyway, if yo've got bored reading this and cant actually classify urself into any of these, lets take a look at popular 'girl types'
Girl 1: The ubiquitous USER
This is the type by which all girls are tagged. They are like weeds, very selfish characters. They will usually be quite good looking (this is phase 1 of their plan actually) and will mix very well with guys. And the innocent fellows will be victimised earlier on in the game. They make use of guys in their own petty ways. And in exchange for the favors obtained from guys, they will usually make the guy feel jealous by hinting about possible relationships with some other third person. A typical convo would be like this:
Boy: Ok, so what plans do u have for tonight?
Girl: Actually, am going out for dinner with a friend
Boy: Oh, really..... who is it?
Girl: (Being too coy) I dont know if I can tell u.... he might not like it
Boy: (Really pissed now) ok, fine then....
Girl: (After quite some time of idle chit chat and discussion of other stuff) Hey the guy is my cousin ok? dont get worked up for all this!
Now, what do u suppose is the reaction of our guy?? He's so happy that the so called guy is not some other 'rival' and immediately he showers her with some gift or the other..... (hasnt this happened to u ppl??? - If it has, pls for heaven's sake dump the bitch!!)
But these girls are also very careful. They never make any honest statement abt their interest in the guys. They just like to keep the guy waiting....
Girl 2: Frank Characters
Like our Type 10 guys, these are also very rare finds. Totally frank, would never want anyone to get hurt. Can be read like an open book. This is the type that usually succeeds in creating a lot of platonic relationships with guys. But guys are normally really silly and never realise the value of such girls. Ex is Kajol in Kuch Kuch Hota Hai and Shahrukh in the same film... lol!!!
Girl 3: Stealers
They are girls who usually befriend guys they like and act like they'll help the guy in all his affairs and stuff, but then end up stealing the guy from his girl. Beware of these ppl - they are usually more beautiful than type 1 girls (obviously... otherwise how do u think they succeed in stealing guys?)
Anyway, this didnt come out as well as i expected it to - mainly cos I've stopped myself from mentioning examples..If u have any doubts reg whom i've classified into which group, pls contact me... lol!!!
Sunday, June 11, 2006
Just remember that there are two sides to any issue. This reservation is no exception either. (One thing - none of these are my own ideas - they are just stuff I happened to read.. i did feel its true to an extent)
Lets take a look at the kind of classmates we had in school and college. Did u feel there was a difference between the kind of outlook and ambitions these two sets of ppl had??? I passed out of a school where the majority of my classmates were from the upper middle class and high-society (rolling in money kinds)
And I know for a fact that all of them are doing quite well today. Many of them are OBCs (no SC and STs cos am pretty sure they wouldnt have been able to afford the expensive education provided here!) and max FCs. Ofcourse all of us have had minor setbacks in terms of institutions of higher education- where in none of us could get into govt univ cos of the reservation issue and stuff - but just think a little - the problems we had were just regarding univ names; think of the innumerable no of ppl who cannot even afford a degree cos of the economic situation at home.
And talking abt reservation at IITs and IIMs... My dear ppl, do u think it is brains that get you into these places???? Bull shit!!! (I know i sound like the fox in the 'fox and sour grapes' story... but just read on) Brains are a vital part, but in no way the only part. How much hard work do u think u need to put in?? (refer hari's blog where he says he hardly slept for 2-3 hours every day) And what with all the FIITJEE coaching classes and rot, where is the entrance exam a kind of test of intelligence? It has become a battle for 'hardworking' and 'memorising' ability. Coming to the point, do you think a kid, whose parents are not educated and not earning well enough, can afford to enroll him at a KSR, TRS tuition center? (the charges used to be soooo high some 5 yrs back.... it wouldve become phenomenal now!) Or for that matter, enrol him in a Brilliant's Tutorial Postal course?? No - so what? Already he has lost out on the chance to get into one of these institutions.
The other day I was walking by and I overheard a taxi driver talkin to someone over the phone. The guy's question was this: 'My kid has passed his 10th std with 90% (pretty good, if you ask me) and wants to take First Group. Is it ok? It seems this First Group is something to do with Maths, Comp Sci and all'.
Hari, tell me this, how many times did your mom come to school with u, speak to ure teachers abt ure performance? And am sure she knew very well what the meaning of First Group was and who were the best coaches for the IIT entrance and what was the diff between CBSE and State Board Education? Do you think someone else whose mom is not as educated, would be getting the kind of bloody attention you got???
You were studying for your entrance test an am sure through out ure mom would have encouraged you to buy all the best books available in the market, made coffee and tea for u while u were up at night? Can a guy who does not get four square meals a day afford this kind of attention?
Leave the IITs, get to the IIMs. How come you've picked up the english language so well?? Isnt it cos of the superior teaching at your school? The kind of books that you were asked to read while at school, the kind of ppl u mixed with?? Now, isnt English a major part of the entrance test for the IIMs? Assuming you had a corporation school education, for no better reason than that you couldnt afford anything else, would you be where u are today? And how do u think ure parents were able to afford everything they gave u? - Isnt it cos they were educated and isnt that because ure whole family knew the importance of education, right from the time of ure grandparents?? So what kind of an unfair exam is this aptitude test then? Wasnt Ambani a much more successful businessman than most others today, without the necessary degrees? So can we say that the business sense should be tested rather than any other thing??
Not that I am pro reservation. Yes, it has affected me to a great extent. But then the way I see it, for ages the FCs have been riding high. Am not asking anyone to give it up, but its time we shared it with others.
Ofcourse the kind of reservation that is going on now is totally biased. Instead of being based on class, it should be based on 'economic status' and NOTHING else!
And the standard of education provided for at elementary govt school level should first be improved. Maybe only after that the politicians can talk of reservation!
And frankly the real persons who are affected by this are only the economically downtrodden - esp economically backward FCs.
Thursday, June 08, 2006
A for acha laga apple.
B for bada apple.
C for chhota apple.
D for dusra apple.
E for ek aur apple.
F for fokat ka apple.
G for gol apple.
H for hazar apple
I for itney saarey apple???
J for jaao nahi khaana hai apple
K for kaise nahi khaayengey apple
L for lena padhega tumko yeh apple
M for mujhe nahi chahiye itne apple
N for naa nahi kehtey kyunkey yeh hai apple
O for Oh to tumne khaa daale yeh saare apple
P for peth bhar khaao apple
Q for qismat mein nahi hoti hai sabke, yeh apple
R for roz agar khaao tum apple
S for sehetmand rahoge khaaogey agar tum apple
T for tumko nahi milengey itney achey apple
U for udhaar kii nahi hai yeh apple
V for very tasty hai yeh apple
W for waste na karo time aur khaalo jaldi se apple
X for X'mas mei bhii khane padenge apple
Y for youn na chehra phero dekhkey apple
Z for zaraasa aur khaalo apple
Sunday, June 04, 2006
Anyway, let me come to my personal experience in the college and then whoever reads this can decide for themselves if there is any truth in my statements.
Taking you people back to my pre-college days:
I had just finished my TNPCEE (another article on the uselessness of that exam coming up) and knew that I had ‘muffed’ it! I did real badly on that and was awaiting my results (wats worse – I belong to the ill fated FC – more on that also coming up). Since I had already failed in trying to step into IIT (Was not smart enuf for that – not hardworking enuf either!!) I started gathering info about the ‘best’ colleges in TN – I had also decided that I wouldn’t stay away from home (another stupidity! – more on that also later – god! When u write on one topic you get sooo many many ideas for others!!). So then the list narrowed down to SVCE, Crescent, SRM, SB. Ok…. So it makes sense to get into the first three colleges – but there were minor problems for all. First of all my cut off was not enuf to obtain even ‘Bachelors in Back Scratching’ from SVCE. And Crescent was too far off so there were commuting problems. And then SRM had hiked its fees that particular year, which meant I’d have to pay double the amount I would be payin in any other coll and so guess what? – I landed up in SB (Since then I STOPPED praying to GOD…… there was no God according to me for those 4 yrs!)
Anyway, so I was all pepped up and excited – u know, first day of college and then I was standing at the ‘hip’ bus stop (for those of you from Chennai – That’s Maharaja Stores) chatting with a lot of exited youngsters (little did we know what was in store for us!) and then comes the first disappointment rolling down the road – GAWD! Wat a BUS!! VOLVO would lose to this!!! Amazing engine noise, silent brakes, smmmmmmooooooooooth ride, wowwww!! Anyway, it was not very different from a PTC bus, only the outer color was (ya! Excellent colour sense the management had!!) Anyway, we trooped into this and got to the exotic college campus (So many trees, so green and cooooool!!! Lovely!!)
Then we were introduced to ‘The Pandal’ – the amazing ‘permanent shamiana’ located on the campus – remote from the classrooms and close to the Chairman’s home. This great thing is our ‘auditorium’ – our open air theater, etc, etc. In fact the college people are so shameless, they conduct inter-college events here! And wats worse they conducted placement interviews here! (for Infy I heard)
Anyway, here our Chairman is supposed to give us the welcome address – ya! It really welcoming us!! The heatedness of the pandal disappear in the sweetenness of the speaking of the highest of the authority of the college of the university! The sayings of the great peoples is somethings very hardened to chew (i.e., watever the great person said was very hard to digest) but it saying in very fun way that all the parents, their wives and sons and gurls are laugh and laugh! They saying – ‘Girl girl jingle jingle no problem, boy boy mingle mingle no problem, but girl boy jingle mingle BIG problem’!!! Then they say some rules and also tell why rules –
Rule No.1 : Gurl - boy no talk
Explanation: Then they run-awaying as lovers!
Rule No.2 : Senior – junior no talk
Explanation: Then the senior boy ask the junior boy ‘Ey, what is the name of that bootiful gurl in your class’ and then after he finding the name, he finding address and going and visitng her, follow her and creation of all the problems!
Rule No.3: Eating only in mess (Really, it’s a MESSSSSS!!!)
Explanation: Then the student bringing lunch from the home, he feel the hungry before and starting to do the eating in the class and the teacher teaching and no listen. Then he feel the hungry at lunch and eat all the junk food like banana, samosa etc.
Rule No. 4: Travel only by college bus
(This was the ONLY sensible thing in the college – cos this helped avoid a lot of accidents – I mean accidents involving college students – of course the bus drivers driving rashly and killing innocent pedestrians is another case entirely!)
Rule No.5: No out going from college campus
Explanation: Students comes in the morning. That time they be very well. But then mid noon they seeing that good film put in the theater. Then what do they? Tell ‘Ayyo, stomach ache and tryin to do the runway from college. This bad!
Rule No.6: No change the bus route
Explanation: Again good looking gurl on bus, so to can able to do the follow they go on the bus and then do the galatta
Then the follow of issuement of ‘Rule Book’.
(At this juncture I put a full stop to my broken english – I need a break, my the sentence formation can do (ability) is goned!!!!!)
Anyone who is reading this, do u happen to have a copy of the Rule Book? (Please pass it on to me if you do…) Really, watever I’ve written above is mentioned in that book – in the same way – Rotten English!!!
See, why can’t he talk in his mother tongue if he‘s comfortable with that??? Its not like the college is full of students from all over the world (puhlease! Not even from all over South India!!) Besides even if they were, they wouldn't understand what he was trying to say!
But anyway, I still can’t forget the way my parents and all the others laffed! Funny!!!! But ofcourse we had to cover our faces and laff cos we knew there would be ‘Spies’ all over!! (This is TRUE!!)
Ok, then after this we went to our respective classes and I noticed that the classrooms were maintained worse than my school classrooms!! And there was also this funny rule that girls should sit only in the first few rows!!! Anyway, then I knew that I was done for, cos throughout my school days I had been a notorious back bencher.
And then they gave out a few measly books and notebooks and charged us 2500/- bucks for that! (hey… only now I realise that my narration is full of ‘!’…..Really…. it’s a wonder how we ppl survived thro college!!!)
The first day got over more or less smoothly….
Come second day and what do we see?? – Three guesses (No way students from decent institutions will b able to guess-) FLYING SQUAD! – ha ha ha ha ha ha ha !!!! There would be this group of 6 – 8 jobless individuals who would come storming into your class to check on u – i.e, checking would include:
Do they shave every morning. (I heard that in future they are planning to send questionnaires to all parents regarding their kids shaving, shitting routines – and parents will be given a prize depending on how much extra information they can volunteer – which includes stuff like ‘how much more time did your kid stay in the toilet on Friday compared to last Monday’)
Are they wearing shoes (If the shoes are not polished and hence as a result look worse than a beggar’s slipper it does not matter – I know cos I used to wear these shoes that even the street dog wouldn’t care to sniff!)
Are they wearing id card? (There s a rule coming up which says that students have to pin up their handkerchiefs to their shirt pockets – so that they don’t tend to wipe their hands on their fellow girl classmates’ dupattas!)
Have they pinned their dupattas properly? (Sometimes I used to get so scared that one day they’d ask me to wear dupatta over my workshop uniform – pant & shirt)
Have they brought calculator?
Have they brought college calendar? (The cover page has a photo of the Chairman grinning like ‘I-have-done-my-shitting-today,-what-about-u?’ in a very MGR style)
Have the students brought all note books? (i.e if there are 6 subject classes during the day, then you need to have brought 6 notebooks to write down the words of wisdom passed on by the staff)
Is anyone sleeping in class ? (Ha ha!! The very act of checking for ‘sleeping’ students shows what confidence they have in their staffs’ teaching ability!
And the most important – are the guys and girls talking, or look like they are about to start a conversation, or are they staring at each other, etc etc.
*(Anyway in my personal opinion this college would have been a haven for gays! )
Now, don’t wonder if I am going to mention anything more abt my classmates and stuff like that – Sorry, that would take up a whole blog – I’ll dedicate it to my classmates! This will deal only with college rules and stuff….
There were also some ppl named ‘attenders’ or ‘jees’ who would be walkin the beat outside our classrooms. Their job also included:
Checking for id cards
Checking if any student is sleeping in class
Checking for ragging incidents
Checking for ‘girl boy jingling mingling’
Any rowdy behaviour (actually, this behaviour, if exhibited by management will be applauded) – which includes a wide variety of activities from, eating during class hours, trying to bunk college, trying to act smart in class to stabbing your benchmate – and the penalty, I suppose, is the same for everything! He he!!
Ok, then let me move on –
There were also some weird rules regarding class tests and exams (which we’ve been violating from our 4th semester). In our first year, if anyone scored less than 50% marks in any of the exams they’d be forced to stay in college after 3.30pm and ‘study’.
Oh, at this point I also have to mention the even funnier rule reg writing your Mid Sem and Model Exams:
The subject staff will come to check your paper some 2 hours after the exam has started and they’ll evaluate you on the spot as to whether you’ve bullshitted enuf to pass the exam or not. If you haven't then you’ve gotta stay till evening 3.30pm while your luckier co-bullshitters can run away at 12.30 pm. (Hari, do u remember the frequent passing of answer books – esp when we used to write the exam in the GD JP lab, FM lab and stuff???? Ha ha!! I distinctly remember passing on qn papers crammed with answers to Wilfred and co. )
Then the most ridiculous rule when it came to Univ exams. The exam will start only at 10.00 am but the college bus will pick us up at the usual time – 6.45 or 7.00 am and we have to sit in college and study till the start of the exam. And here there was this rule that girls and boys shouldn’t discuss subject matter (they shouldn’t discuss anything else either!) If any student had doubts, they should necessarily contact only the prof (arrey!!! If they knew something we wouldn’t even have doubts right?!!!! He he – Not true of all our staff anyway!! Some of them were good – But u can count them out on one hand)
And no semester breaks – In fact I got a WHOLE weekend to chill out after my First Year in this college! (IMAGINE – 2 Days!!)
And there was also this rule abt attendance. The univ demands 65% and my college demanded 95%.
(U don’t know how many days my friend and I would sit inside the bus and pray fervently that the Chairman or one of his close family should die so that we’d get a few days off!)
Its not even like the teaching is so exemplary that the college cares so much abt u not missing even one class! The teaching was (is, I am sure) sub standard. In fact in many of the classes my classmates used to shout soooo much that the staff would be forced to put an end to his mediocre teaching!
Now coming to the high point of this college – the point that differentiates it from others (ya! I know ure wondering if there arent enuf differences already!!) – This is Office Duty!
Office Duty is a very noble thing – It means u have to stand in front of the Director’s office and wish them everytime they roll past (ya! They r not capable of walking or any other normal human (e)motions!)
And you can stop this sycophancy when they return your id card (My id card used to look like some 10 dogs had fought for it!)
And when will they return your id card?
When you have ass kissed for long enough
When your parents have bothered to come to college and listen to the directors’ words of wisdom and apologised for not having brought u up properly, for not caring enuf abt their kid’s future (which could be really spoilt if the kid continued this dangerous habit of not bringing the college calendar everyday!!)
If you have enough influence to convince everyone that you are hopeless and nothing they do can ever change your natural rowdy behaviour (This is when they identify tht u are ‘one among them’!!)
Hmmm… wat else? This is the college! Wonderful place – Really I didn’t know ppl in Madras were dumb enuf to actually rate this place as a top notch college!
That’s it for now!! Please watch out for my blog on ‘My College Mates’
Personally, I feel so.
But, I have been brought up this way. - to take decisions at every stage depending on what others will think of me. Be it the choosing of Science Stream, or deciding to be an Engineer. But somewhere down the line I have got really frustrated – especially in not being able to do things that I really wanted to do just because of ‘others’. And its not like these invisible commentators are going to see you through till you stop breathing!
I feel that the biggest liability for anyone is a ‘sensitive’ nature. Trust me, because I do have one. It is a problem, mainly because, not everyone else around us is considerate about the feelings of others. Not too many people really care about what effect their words have – they say things just for the heck of it – to say SOMETHING. And it becomes a huge problem if we give ear to all these loose talks.
Now, I am just cursing myself for having grown up to be so sensitive. But of course it is not like as if I really change myself to suit other’s views. This makes things even tougher – Its like as if I am saying – ‘I’ll not change just because someone else is asking me to do so, but although I don’t respect their views, I want them to think highly of me’! I also know that this is not possible – but still am weak enough to yearn for this!I really have no clear idea of what I want to express in this article. I think I would like to encourage people to not be like me – to not bring up their children like this
Friday, June 02, 2006
First, when we talk of affirmative action, we are talking of a act of redressal - a command to the wrongdoer to take positive action. Mostly we talk of affirmative action with respect to ethnic minorities, women etc. India is the ONLY country were we apply it to castes. A comparison has been made with USA, talking of its affirmative action policies - it should be understood that many states, notably California and Washington do NOT subscribe to AA. Also, in USA and UK we have the contribution system which takes into account merit, family earnings etc.
Moving on to merit, it is tough to quantify a persons potential. Agreeed. However we do have systems wherein we can at least partially evaluate a students faculty. If at 18 a person cannot multiply 15 and 13, it is to be understood that he is no Ramanujam!! Yes, our tests need to be streamlined but that does not mean we can question the concept of merit. Is the SAT / GRE system or the O and A level system perfect? Hell no. But they sure do their jobs.
So what would be a solution?
First, to address merit - a unified board across India with a single entrance exam to UG colleges like SAT, with separate common tests for engg /law / med..
Next, as far as affirmative action goes - introduce the contribution system. Let a student show his family earnings and based on it, a percentage would be paid by the family and the rest by the govt. Free more money for scholarships and financial aid. Enhance the quality of rural education. Introduce a quota for the rural students on the condition that one generation and one generation of a family alone is eligible for the reservation. To continue " AA " on the basis of caste only contributes to a India torn into pieces.
Most of its critics quickly spell out their reasons – the vulgarity, violence, lack of social responsibility, the glorification of a gangster. But there have been movies that have depicted gangsters and crooks in the past, and have glorified violence and murder. From kamal’s Sathya to Maniratnam’s Ayutha Ezhuthu . In fact one can argue that kamal’s Virumaandi was as violent and gory a movie.So what is the difference?
The difference between Selva and a Mani is clear. Both are director’s director’s. But songs like “ Enga area ulla varathe……..” and dialogues like “ enna vayasukku vandhuttaya ‘ – spoken when kumar is chased by his mom clearly define the boundaries. Mani would never have had a dialogue / song like that. In mani movies women are given consideration and respect – not sex symbols to leer at. But then, for a Kumar, such dialogue comes naturally. Again Mani is a director of the educated while Selva is an arty director of the masses. For the first time in Tamil cinema we are seeing Quality commercial cinema. Selva succeeds where the Mani’s and Kamal’s fail.
Thus, for a person sitting in Sathyam balcony, paying 100 Rs. For a ticket, his very skin tingles with horror. Ah!! The sheer vulgarity and crassness. But a few kms away at Rohini, the audience erupts as Kumar tells the educated dogs to keep away. It is this crassness, one that is anathema to the middle class mind that Selva capitalizes on – the sheer shock value that propel his movies.
But, there is one more difference. Be it Sathya, Inba or Virumaandi – it is easy to empathize with any of them, for they all have their redeeming qualities. If sathya is a champion of the poor, Inba a person who actually loves his wife and Virumaandi the boorish child – Kumar has none. Throughout the movie, Kumar is depicted as an ANIMAL. Each and every movement of his is PREDATORY. The only time we see a human in Kumar is when he is with his son. In no other movie have we seen something like this.
Pudupettai is all about smells. The smell of blood, the scent of victory, the sniff of power , the smell of a woman– this is a zone where no one has dared tread before.
There are powerful scenes that can disgust you – or give you a heady sensual feeling. The scene where kumar buries his father alive – a planned act of vendetta – the punishment cruelly meted out to the man who battered and murdered his mother – you can see the balcony cringe – but for those who can empathise with Kumar – those who know what he went through – for every man who understands what his mother went through and can empathise with it – there is an almost sensual feeling – a cathartic effect – and you can grin in sardonic satisfaction as the father gets his just dues.
Herein is the difference between Selva and the rest. There is no white and black in a Selva movie – only grey. There is no call to arms as in yuva nor a catharsis as in Indian. The choice is yours. If Mani is the “feel good “ director for the educated, there is no such feel good over here. If the movie ends abruptly and in an irresponsible way – THAT IS LIFE. And no matter how many educated people vilify the movie – the bottom line is this is as real as it gets – and if you deny this, you are living in an illusionary world.
No matter who you are, what you do – do not miss this movie.
Sunday, May 28, 2006
If you have not yet seen this -do not.
Friday, May 19, 2006
Not only do these gutter bred mongrels have the audacity to talk of reservations in educational institutes, private sectors etc., they even acknowledge this as a political weapon. I had read an article by " Dr. " Udit Raj, Chairman All India SC / ST Association, that is on Rediff. To read the article click here.
This is an open letter to our beloved chairman and our equally beloved Minister of the HRD :
First, Mr Udit , you talk of merit - You talk of knowledge of English, cramming etc. What the fuck do you know of merit, you bloody bastard? How dare you talk of us as mere crammers pups? Do you have any idea of the CBSE syllabus? Do you now what it takes to get into the IIT? Merit? Don't you dare use that word you ignorant boot licker.
You say that not many inventions are from Indians in the OC. Do you know why, you ignorant SOB? Because by the time they have patents issued in their name, they are green card holders. Do you know why they are no longer in India? Because of fucking sods like you.
You calmly assert that politicians dare not do anything, even if they do not support reservations. You disgusting piece of excreta - you calmly talk of vote banks and politics. (Note. - This is a wake up call to all you OC's out there - WAKE UP. Until and unless WE start voting in right earnest, making ourselves an votebank that no one dare ignore, these curs would always get the better of us.)
Patriotic feelings, honesty, humble feelings, hard work. You arrogant twerp. Do you know what the fuck your " hard working " SC's and ST's were doing in my college - acting like bloody goonda, disturbing the peace and not allowing a single class to occur. Hard work? WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS, YOU BLOODY BEGGAR? Do you know what it is to study each and every day, having no recreation? Do you know what it feels like, when for two bloody years, getting 2 hours of sleep a day was a LUXURY? What do you know, you who have had every thing handed to you in a begging bowl?
Do you know what your candidates are doing after 4 years of their studies? Do you know how many of them are dropouts? Do you know how long it takes for your candidates to complete a 4 year course?
Why is it Mr Arjun Singh is it that when you or your family members are ill, they fly to the US and not to one of " your " doctors? Why is it that your sons and daughters have grand american degrees? Aren't these colleges good enough for you?
A final word Mr Udit - You say we need to part with the pie of cake we have - Understand that your tactics will not work for ever - there will come a time when you and your brethren will be squashed forever.
P.S - Remember there is no disgrace in cleaning latrines - if that is your aptitude - there is no use in trying to rise above your capability.
P.P.S - Remember the blacks in USA who were treated worse than you. First they matched the performance of the whites, then raised the bar and then they spoke of discrimination. They did not ask for seats for each and everyone in the ghetto - only those whose performance was par excellence. Get your people to match ours - and then we shall proudly talk of an intergrated society.
Till then, FUCK YOU.
Note : - There is a pretty funny article on reservations. To read it check this link.
Monday, May 08, 2006
On a personal level am overjoyed that the autocratic ***** will not be returning. A few weeks back the results were simply too close to call with no clear idea as to who's vote share the DMDK would be cutting into. Also with quite a few people in Chennai talking about the Lok Paritantran, who, if they manage to get a couple of seats through would do so at the DMK's expense. The LP seems to have proven a damp squib as I expected. Having followed the exit polls for most of the elections, my prediction would probably be DMK with 110-120 seats, DPA with 200+ seats and the AIADMK with around 15-20.
Let us hope that May 11 would see this dictatorial reign coming to an end finally.
Sunday, April 23, 2006
Though tje acting was not satisfactory,the substance was there.I condemn those who have seen this film just for the cheap flicks of prostitution.
The film is a very good reflection of old-time Orissa.The term "Panda" is a term used in Orissa for priests turned fortune tellers,who accost you as soon as you land in Bhuvaneshwar or Puri railway stations.The film gives a true overview of what these priests were like in the past(according to grand-mother stories).
I just loved the scene where Sushmita Condemns Bhuvan Panda inside 'Lal Bathi' and the scene where she learns about "Dak Babu's" death..The last scene was well portrayed,although an archetypical good vs evil scene..
I am really surprised that none of the members of this bog commented on this film.
Thursday, April 20, 2006
great guts chandrika even we are going to follow suit
Sunday, April 02, 2006
Anyway, that apart, I have decided to pour out my heartfelt feelings about the work I was so doing so far at my office; the reason why I have chosen this moment for penning these thoughts is that my work life is over at this place – yes, I have put in my papers!!
Of course all this is not without a back up – I have decided to obtain a Management degree. Now, what I wish to say in this blog is clear in my head; although this being a subject close to my heart, my thoughts might not be too coherent and I prefer to keep it that way – let this not be an organised essay – let it be a true revelation of my feelings (as I feel!)
As my close friends know, I have been very frustrated with this job for quite some time now. The thought of resigning has been at the back of my mind for about 6 months now. You might ask me if I have taken any steps to resolve problems I had at my workplace. I did. But of course you cannot expect a fresher to change the work culture. This is the first time I am seeing people who are so not interested in their jobs – people who’ll have no shame in simply earning hefty pay packets without contributing to the organisation in a way that befits their position! Anyway, the start of this blog was the receipt of a rather moving email – from one of my well wishers here. I had confided in him that I was not satisfied with working here, a couple of months ago. And he was helping me from the sidelines – but lets face it, its my job, my life and I have to carry out the ‘culture-change’ that I am talking about.
A few days before I put in my papers, this friend had an offer for me – a very exciting profile – sprinkled with international travelling (“I cant guarantee you anything, mind you, after all, the organisation has its own limitations”) Ofcourse as expected there was a catch in this. This would mean that I had to stay put here for another 3 yrs!! Simply outta qn!! NO WAY!! But I cant say so flatly to someone who is actually trying to help me out. So as a palliative I suggested ‘re-considering’ my decision. And however articulate I might be in putting down my thoughts on paper, I am as bad at talking it out! And I had a meeting with him and came out feeling like I had betrayed the company!!
As if to make things worse, I received a mail from the same person giving me instances of how committed his engineers were and how it was possible for me to think so badly of the organisation when his engineers thought so well of the same place! And the conclusion was that I was not devoted enough. And that I should think twice before taking up my next job!!! Man!! I didn’t know how to react. As touched as I am by his fatherly advice to me, I was upset that I had conveyed such an impression. Did I not do well at portraying myself to be the ‘pathetic’ worker – the person who has lost all self confidence after starting to work at this place?? – Its not even a question of portraying myself like that – I AM THAT!!!!
Anyway, after considering how to counter the attack I decided to go ahead and shoot a mail – after all I sound better on paper!!
So then I shot it all out – how I had already thrown away one opportunity to go abroad for my Masters just for this job! Not once, but TWICE – I had deferred the admit during my first year of work at this place and the very next year I cancelled my deferred admit, all the time hoping that my job would be more promising. But I met only with disappointment. I set it out clearly that my response was not a ‘defensive reaction’. I was not trying to come out of this mess looking sweet and innocent. Rather I didn’t care to justify any of my actions – including qns on why I didn’t do this to improve my plight etc etc.! And I appealed to his sense of fairness – I have asked him if he feels it is the right thing to ask me to throw away another opportunity – when in 2 yrs I have not seen anything else??!!!
Now that I have done this, I feel a bit apprehensive and relieved at the same time. Apprehensive, because I don’t want my revelations to be taken in the wrong sense – because I am pretty sure not a soul would support me on any of my so called grievances – cos everybody is interested only in covering their rears! But I look at my mail as a plea to ensure that my successors don’t go through this useless grind!
I am still surprised at the kind of people I see at my work place – Can you believe that they are satisfied in just sitting and chatting and whiling away time – all the while I am sure their spouses would be thinking that these ppl are working so hard! Shameless I call this – But I am not that impractical to ask them to resign – they must be havin families to support- But still the least you can do is acknowledge that your condition is sad! Only when you notice that your surrounding is bad do u get the urge to change it! But these people parade around like they are so busy! (Man! I am so relieved that I can put a stop to watching all this!!)
Anyway, that’s the end of my blog – More on some interesting impersonal stuff later!!
Saturday, April 01, 2006
When a shy, frightened pre-school victim was asked if her grandfather had hurt her when he touched her,she responded, "Only in my heart."
-The Secrecy of Child Sexual Abuse, Nancy Faulkner
In many crucial situations of our life, we adults struggle to make a choice, but somehow manage to come out with one that is fulfilling. We struggle inspite of our well learnt lessons through arduous experiences in our life. Even the various freedoms we possess such as the freedom of thought and speech do not help us in the right moment of our life. What about the young tender children who lack all these? What about the young developing lives who don’t even know about the rights they possess?
What would happen to such vulnerable children when they are suddenly molested by the ones they loved and trusted? They undergo a huge emotional devastation! The sexually abused child may develop some serious long term psychological disorders like depression, self-destructive behavior, anxiety, feelings of isolation and stigma, poor self-esteem, difficulty in trusting others, tendency toward revictimization, substance abuse, and sexual maladjustment.
Child sexual abuse is not something that happens rarely to some 1 child out of 1000 children. It is something that almost every child would have encountered in her/his life. Statistics say that 1 out of 3 girl children and 1 out of 6 boy children are being sexually exploited and abused. So why is this serious problem not addressed with the importance and urgency it deserves? Why does it still elude our attention among the various social issues and problems that are viewed seriously? Lack of awareness among the people! Yes only lack of awareness and the social stigma attached to it keeps the issue far from important.
The serious problem associated with this issue that makes it less important is the reluctance of the child to open up to her/his parents. It is primarily because of the sense of guilt that is being instilled in the innocent minds by the basic attitudes of the society and in some cases by the perpetrator. In a society, where the word “sex” is considered as a sin and taboo to even adults, leave alone children, how would the child be expected to speak freely about her/his bitter experience? The children start to believe that they are also responsible for such an abuse and feel guilty for letting this happen. Their basic fear of being back answered with the questions like “did you allow it because you got pleasure out of it?” , “why did you allow it to continue?” and “ was it out of your control to stop it?” when disclosed to the parents keeps them closed and shut forever. Children also avoid speaking out because in many cases the sex offender would be a trusted friend of the family or a close relative. This increases the fear of doubt in the child of earning the trust of her/his parents because the blamed person is the one closely related to the family.
There are many adults whose lives have been left in tatters due to their childhood bitter experiences. The implications of such events may cause long lasting damage to the lives of children. In some cases it may even remain dormant waiting for one crucial moment in your life! So, what are the possible ways to protect the children from abuse? There are many, but the effectiveness depends on how carefully it is handled and how far it is practicable and reachable to children and parents as well.
The primary solution is to empower the children in terms of awareness of sexual abuse. It is important to make the children understand that no one has got the right to touch their private parts and to involve in any unacceptable actions with them. It is also equally important to educate the children to free themselves from the sense of guilt and help them to understand that it should be reserved only for the perpetrators. Schools should come forward to educate children about sex, sexuality and sexual abuse. They should also help them by teaching various ways to protect them from such abuse and ways to tackle it. Parents should be vigilant about the people who move closely with their child, no matter how closely related they are to them. In many cases the perpetrator may not be a stranger but closely related in blood to the child like grandfather, maternal uncle, paternal uncle and also shockingly in many cases it is the child’s own father!
How would the parents identify the sex offender or the paedophile? Does he or she (in rare cases) come in any definite shape? No definitely not! Then how would you identify? They look like school principals, and close relatives, and close well trusted family friends, and clergy, and teachers, and coaches, and police officers, and the nice old man next door, and the nice young man next door, and the baby-sitter ... or my neighbor ... or your neighbor?
A shameful fact:
90% of the child sexual abusers are male.
“Abuse survivors tell us that one of the problems that lingers into adulthood and that keeps the secret intact for years, is the child's feeling that they were somehow to blame, and as a result, they are "dirty" or "soiled." Sex offenders are smart. They know about "pleasure guilt" and may even emphasize it to keep the sordid secret, -- "If you tell anyone about this, they'll think you're bad."”
-Adult-Child Sex: Abuse or Misuse?, Nancy Faulkner Ph.d
“During an initial therapy session with a senior citizen, I asked one of my routine interview questions: "Have you ever been sexually abused?" She paused, then nodded slowly. Although she had been in therapy most of her adult life, there was no record of sexual victimization in her overflowing patient file. Her response, "No one ever asked."”
- Nancy Faulkner Ph.d
Why don't children tell?
No one will believe me.
No one cares.
I'll get someone in trouble, and they'll have to go to jail--and
Everyone will blame me for telling.
It happens to everyone.
It won't happen again.
Everyone will know.
I'll have to go to court.
People will ask me lots of questions.
It's too embarrassing.
I'll get in trouble.
I've done something bad.
It's my fault.
Why do we focus on the word SEX?
Why don't we look at the real issues--
Recently three youngsters in Chennai were awarded for creating awareness about child sexual abuse. Nancy Veronica, Vipin and Alankar have been working with schools aince 2004 through the ‘ School Based Initiative for the Prevention and Awareness of Child Sexual Abuse (SBIPAC).
Source: Metro Plus, supplement of The Hindu
“In a study, an attempt was made to assess the frequency of young adolescents who had been sexually abused but who had not disclosed, and to assess the frequency of young adolescents who were uncertain if they were victims. The most outstanding result of the research was of those students who responded they had been sexually abused, 100% responded they had not disclosed the abuse to an adult. Additionally, six percent of the young adolescents in the study responded "I don't know" to the question of whether they had been sexually abused, confirming there are young adolescents who are uncertain about having been sexually abused.”
- Pandora's Box: The Secrecy of Child Sexual Abuse.